Our Mental Health & Our Relationship with Ourself
By Izzy Atkinson
It’s safe to say the past 12 months have been nothing short of draining, overwhelming, exhausting, and traumatic. We have been living through something that has uprooted our lives and changed our reality.
“This past year has been a rollercoaster filled with hope and defeat, love and pain, and peace and chaos. ”
When this pandemic first hit, it was the “big pause” of the world. It was the first time we saw everyone staying home, slowing down, getting outside more, spending more time with family, and even relaxing more. This honeymoon phase of the pandemic was something we all thought would last a few weeks, maybe a few months at most. When the reality of this pandemic set in, we started to see more clearly that we were in this for the long haul.
Looking back on this past year, here are my reflections on how this pandemic has profoundly affected our mental health and our relationship with our bodies and how we can use these reflections to be more gentle with ourselves and our bodies moving forward.
We’ve been living in survival mode for a year.
Since this pandemic started, we have been on auto-drive and haven’t stopped. We have lived in a reactionary state where we are doing whatever we can to just get through the day. We are doing what we need to do to survive.
How does this affect your mental health?
Survival mode causes our bodies to live in a fight-or-flight state. It increases our cortisol (stress levels) and causes anxiety and depression.
How can you get out of survival mode?
Ask yourself what things you are doing each day that are out of panic or are solely reactionary (constantly reacting to something versus being proactive). Are there activities or moments of stillness you can bring into your life that allow you to come out of the fight-or-flight state and remind yourself that not everything is an emergency?
Living through trauma
People hear about trauma and think you have to live through an isolated incident to experience trauma, but the reality is that trauma is not a one-size-fits-all model. With this pandemic, we have been living through trauma every day.
How does this affect your mental health?
It causes anxiety, depression, insomnia, fatigue, the need to withdraw/isolate, feeling numb and disconnected, and chronic stress on the body.
How can you cope with the trauma we are facing?
First, identify the triggers that might be causing you moments of increased anxiety, sadness, or stress—for example - the news. If the media is causing you more angst, shut it off. Prioritize getting outside, disconnecting from social media, or talking with loved ones who are struggling too. Try implementing a practice that focuses on bringing you back to the present moment, like meditation, walking, grounding, or a gratitude journal.
Isolation
Humans are meant to be connected - we are meant to have physical touch and share experiences with others. That’s what makes us human.
How does isolation affect your mental health?
It increases anxiety, depression, loneliness, shame, guilt, lack of motivation, and a constant feeling of being “other” or “unwanted” or different.
How can we deal with isolation during a pandemic?
Build a routine at home that keeps you connected with those you love, whether it be weekly zoom game nights, weekly zoom Netflix and wine nights, or something that makes you feel connected, like joining a book club. If we can find ways to connect with others and find commonality with others, it helps deepen our sense of self and purpose and reminds us of our value in other relationships and our life.
Too much technology/Stimulation
We all know we are consuming 24/7 nowadays. Between Instagram, Tik Tok, Clubhouse, Netflix, and working remotely, we constantly engage with technology.
How does this affect your mental health?
You are putting your brain in stimulation overdrive. We are consuming, consuming, consuming, but never taking breaks to pause, digest, or step away.
How can you manage your technology intake?
Take breaks from your phone! Set timers where you engage with social media or email on your phone, and then set timers where you are stepping away from your phone to pause. Go outside and walk without your phone on you so you can be fully present. Pick up a hobby that allows you to tap into your creativity, like painting. Set boundaries with work so you aren’t accessible via email at all hours of the day and night.
Fear of gaining weight and our bodies changing
Once gyms shut down last spring, there was instant panic across our country about the quarantine-15 and gaining weight. This instilled fear and anxiety around our bodies changing and brought on massive amounts of shame and guilt to anyone who did gain weight this past year.
How does this affect your mental health?
When this pandemic hit, everything became out of control. Fixating on our bodies and how they look is a way to control something and deflect what is going on around us. The fear of gaining weight during the pandemic brought feelings of shame, guilt, anxiety, and a sense of not being “disciplined” enough or lazy.
How can you accept your body if it’s changed this past year?
Remember, just like the weather, our bodies have seasons. They change with different times in our lives. When living through something traumatic like this pandemic, it’s important to give your body extra grace, more time to rest and recuperate, and know that it’s OKAY for your body to change. How your body looks does not define who you are inside - remember that.
Izzy is the founder of Wildflower Project and a fitness instructor & personal trainer in Boston.
Wildflower project is an initiative to create community, connection, and awareness around mental health, body image, and the everyday struggles that we all face, but don't talk about enough. Follow Izzy @izzy.atkinson and @wildflower.project